Monday, November 12, 2007

Living With It...


I have this recurring dream about my past that never goes away. I’ve awoken from many fretful nights sweating and near tears. Sanguineous thoughts pollute every shadowed corner of my subconscious; my conscience being awaiting the peripeteia that’s has to come. It just has too.

It never does. I just wake up. The dark creature denigrates my dreams; ripping light out of bliss. Retching the good out of all those past memories; inspissating clouds of fear and regret.

It is infrangible. I’ve confronted the cause of these dreams. It doesn’t go away.

I’ve written novels on the thoughts flooding my head with terrifying, gut splitting memories. Still it doesn’t go away. It commoves continuously throughout my dreams.

That’s the thing about the past. No matter what you do you will never erase it from memory… It’s a constant reminder of where we’ve been, what we’ve done, and who we’ve known.

We can never run away from it…eventually we must face it and accept the terms…

…perhaps someday we will return to the quiescent waters that harbor comfort, even if it is a fata morgana.

Once again we will feel protected…the memories mollified for yet another night.

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